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In late modernity, we are all involved in pedagogies of desire. There is no escape. See James K.A. Smith’s series Desiring the Kingdom; especially You Are What You Love. The church is the incubator and the epicentre of counterdesire, writes Christopher Watkin in Biblical Critical Theory. (473-76)

What are the rhythms of our hearts? The contrast below constitutes a veritable manifesto for an alternative outlook and lifestyle. Chris Watkin contrasts consumption-desire and biblical intimacy-desire in a most helpful manner.

1. Consumption-desire is centred in the consumer, who is always right and votes with the wallet. Intimacy-desire has two poles, the lover and the beloved, who both shape the relationship. Here freedom is defined by the ability to love and give life to one another.
2. Consumption-desire is cyclical: lack, desire, consumption, satisfaction, dissatisfaction, repeat. Intimacy-desire forges a cumulative depth of relationship over time, investing over and over again continuously.
3. Consumption-desire is fuelled by the noble lie of ultimate fulfilment–every product and pleasure contributes to the good life. Intimacy-desire is driven by the promise of ultimate fulfilment when “the kingdom of the world has become the kingdom of our Lord and his Messiah.” It seeks to fan into flame, develop and cultivate existing desires to meet the deepest human needs–servanthood-oriented.
4. Consumption-desire is economic, obeying the laws of scarcity, equivalence, merit, and performance. It is motivated by debt. Intimacy-desire is aneconomic, running free in world of bounty, superabundance, gift, and grace. It is motivated by thankfulness and generosity. The more I give away, the more I have.
5. Consumption-desire is mediated by corporations who like monetizable assets like labour, money, our data. It is based on an investment of capital. It calculates and focuses on your use value. Intimacy-desire is unmediated: God and church do not want your monetizable assets; they want you, yourself as an end, a member of a family. It is based on an investment of character and wants your full enjoyment.
6. Consumption-desire tends towards restlessness; Intimacy-desire tends towards rest.
7. Consumption-desire understands pain as lack, to be remedied by further consumption. Intimacy-desire sees pain as growth, to be worked through and harnessed to deepen the relationship.
8. Consumption-desire is indexed by possessions. Growth comes through accumulating more things, more money and assets. Intimacy-desire is indexed by dispossession–I lose my life in order to save it. My liberation is through self-forgetfulness, kindness and generosity.

“The power and wisdom we desire, the love and freedom, the rest and satisfaction, the justice and fullness…. The cross of Christ is the narrow road to the transfigured fullness of every human desire.” (Christopher Watkin, Biblical Critical Theory, 2022, 433)

Mentally Strong People Do These Things Consistently

Reflect on their progress; they are willing to pivot to improve outcomes; they develop healthy self-critical skills.

Tolerate discomfort, fear and even suffering for the long goal. They are willing to take the necessary (not foolish) risks to grow or improve the world.

Think big; think productively; watch for new opportunities; open doors; associate with eagles.

Examine their core beliefs with a view to staying in touch with reality, and doing what is best for others as well. They take time out to rest and reflect on what is really important in life, to gain clarity.

Do not play victim or complain about circumstances or colleagues; they are prepared to work and succeed on their own merits, while being open to grace and gifts from others who like their project and vision. They have staying power because they know what they want and are bigger than their problems. They are reliable and accountable.

Practice kindness and discretion; they manage emotions, thoughts and behaviour despite success or failures of the moment. They accept full responsibility for past behaviour: good and bad.

They are outrageously generous to the less fortunate and care about and celebrate the success of others.

They are constantly learning new things that improve their skill set and make themselves better human beings.

Stay out of debt which can enslave, oppress and depress.

Develop healthy habits: prayer, Bible reading, worship, compassion, community building. They are willing to go the second mile to help others.

Take care of their health, get exercise and regular medical checkups.

Willing to fail to get where they want to go.